My dumb cousin

He's so stoopid

Thief!

Annoyed

Cousin Leo is so annoying! All he does is follow me and steal my stuff. He snakes the ball and treats and squeak toys and my food! What a jerkface.

Cousin

Why is cousin Leo such a dorkus maximus? I taught him how to jump and how to go up and down stairs, but he still doesn't like climbing the wood stairs unless I go back down and nip at him. Dog, for such a big guy he sure is a fraidy cat!

upset tummy

I was sick yesterday, I had bad diarrhea all over Grandma and Granpa's carpets, I felt bad but I really had to go. Then I threw up all over their bed! At least I got porridge and boiled chicken out of it. :-) Dad thinks it might be because I ate cousin Leo's food, but it may also be because of the rawhide chew treats. I hope it's not because of the rawhide, it's SOOOO GOOD!!

White stuff

Why doesn't this taste yummy!? It's just very cold water!

New car

<p>So dad bought a new car, it's really tall like the one he had last spring. It's a lot harder to get into, I need his help, and it smells funny (something called "new car smell") but dad seems to like it so whatever floats his boat!

Sick

I feel bad for mom, but I'm pretty sick. I don't know what's wrong with me but I've been throwing up and pooping runny diarrhea all over mom's room and bathroom. I know she's tired and grumpy and sleepy, but I don't know what else I can do. I feel really sick, I hope it's nothing serious and just an upset tummy because of mom's mail package I accidentally chewed up today.

Vet

Dad took me to the vet yesterday, I thought I just was going to get another check-up; boy, I couldn't have been more wrong! HE LEFT ME!! The doc came and shaved my leg, and the next thing I know, they injected me with something and I woke up groggy and I was missing something between my legs, as well as a couple teeth. I can't believe Dad did this to me! It was so scary in there and there were way too many barking dogs too. WAAAAA!

Dad finally picked me up today, I was bitter at him for leaving me for so long but all was forgiven as soon as he gave me a tasty treat. He knows how to make me forget! Then we went to Grandma and Grandpa's, which was fun. But then I got a big surprise, I met Dad's sister and her husband, as well as their dog. He was just a baby, he really knew how to get under my nerves! I mean, c'mon, there's only so much pestering I can take before I snap. Plus Dad kept giving the little brat attention, I didn't like that at all and let everyone know, I protect my peeps!

HA!

Dad has my crate set up in the bathroom so that I have a clear view of his bedroom but he leaves the crate door open in such a way that I can't get to the bedroom. Well, too bad for him, because I just figured out how to crawl underneath the door and get to the bedroom! YES!! Not that there's anything to do in the bedroom, he has a gate set up blocking the other side of the bed, so I know where I need to go to get to the good stuff!

Strike a pose

I love taking pictures. Dad calls me the Ladies' Man, boo yeah.

I ♥ paper!

Dad got mad at me again for peeing on the carpet. I can't help it, it's so soft and fuzzy and warm! There's not much I can do, especially when Dad sleeps. Who sleeps during the day anyway?!

Bahaha, I stole a magazine off the coffee table today. I had no idea there was another side, but I did some exploring and boy, did I find a treasure trove of magazines! SO MUCH PAPER, SO LITTLE TIME!!

Paper

So I found some spare paper lying around Dad's house today. I love this stuff!

Training

Dad has been trying to give me commands. I don't know why, he knows I'll do whatever it takes to get a tasty treat! I know I need to sit as soon as there's food coming my way, but then Dad won't bring it to me and wants me to move to him, what's that all about?! It's a battle of wills, but he always wins because I really want a treat. As long as I sit or lie down when Dad says "Sit!" I'll be OK. He always says I'm doing it wrong when I lie down and tries to get me to stand up so he can say "sit!" again, but I don't see the point since all I want is the treat!

Rain

Rain rain, go away, please come back another day! I hate this stuff, but my rain jacket makes it tolerable (barely).

Manhole

I'm starting to get used to peeing on this pad thing, I still prefer the carpet but Dad makes sure I don't have access to that when he disappears and when he sleeps I really have no other choice. Dad walks me for a REALLY long time twice a day, so I'm usually too tired to get into any mischief. But sometimes Dad forgets to walk me (usually when it's raining outside, but that's mostly because I hate the rain) and when he does, WATCH OUT! Magazines, toilet paper, furniture, it's all getting gobbled up!

The weird thing I've noticed about my new home (Dad says it's called "Arlington" but I know that's not true because that's in Texas!) is that there's a lot of hard surfaces here that I never had back home. I mean, I'll be walking along and all of a sudden I'll come across this round circular thing that Dad calls a "manhole cover." He walks on them and tries to get me to go, but I refuse! I know something bad will happen when I walk on one, Dad even tried tricking me by putting a tasty treat in the middle of one, but I stretched and moved around and stretched some more until I finally reached it. There's also red stuff called "bricks" along our walk, as well as a deep hole that's covered by a "grate." I avoid all that stuff, which Dad hates because he says I need to look both ways before getting on to the street. Dad says I'm the "Adrian Monk" of the dog world, I'm sure that's a compliment!

Poop

Mom watched me tonight as Dad disappeared once again (he seems to do this quite often, I wonder where he goes?). We had an accident though, she didn't seem to realize I wasn't done pooping so she pulled on my collar, which made me topple over and land on my poop! She tried wiping it off, but she didn't get it all, so I ended up leaving poo all over my crate and Dad's bathroom floor. He was very upset when he got home, as was I since I couldn't even sleep in my crate, the poo (and smell) was so bad. He gave me a bath/shower when he got home, which I absolutely hated, but at least I felt and smelled clean afterward! Dad spent most of the day cleaning the bathroom and my two beds and my crate and my blankie and my toys. Now everything smells fresh. Yay!

Work

Went back to Grandma and Grandpa's house today, I love their mansion! Grandpa tried walking me but he doesn't do it the right way, he pulls too hard so it feels like I'm getting choked. I'm sure he'll get the hang of it eventually, but until then, I'll just sit on the front porch and stare intently at the door so he gets the hint!

A bit of bad news, for some reason, Dad left right around bedtime? I was so confused and scared! But Grandpa left me in an awesome crate with a warm bed and lots of toys and one of Dad's shirts so I was ok, I just went to sleep.

House breaking and dog party

I was wondering what all the food Dad bought was for. Turns out a bunch of other dogs came over for a party! I met a giant dog named Atlas, and an MONSTER dog named Nalu. Nalu was pretty chill for being such a beast, Atlas was a nutter though, he kept begging for food. I'm going to have to learn that! I'm pretty sure everyone loved me the best though.

Dad wasn't too happy that I keep peeing inside, but I can't help it, this "carpet" is sooooo comfy on my feet! I love it!! Plus it's a new home so I need to let other dogs know that it's *my* house. Dad keeps yelling "NO!" and "PAD!" and points at the grassy-smelling paper on the ground whenever I go. I think he wants me to go on it, but I prefer the warm fuzziness of this "carpet" miracle.

Clarendon Dog Park

We went to the dog park again, and this time I played and ran like crazy! It was so much fun!! I even played with a bunch of big dogs, until one of them tried to nip me and it hurt. That's when I ran to Dad and we left. Dad went to pick up snacks and wine for a "dog party" tonight while Mom took me to a pet store for more fun toys and yummy treats!